Dear Your Excellency, President Donald John Trump,
It has been a glorious year since your electoral victory, to say the least. It has been a glorious year of chuckling and crying (mostly crying) upon learning about your day’s projects. It has been a glorious year of waking up to a fresh batch of your innovative ideas: anything from building a wall and making the Mexicans pay for it, to erasing healthcare as we know it for the new and improved, ‘Trumpcare’. However, my preferred scheme is, without a doubt, your recent executive order of the Muslim Ban.
Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Daniela Gonzalez, and as an ardent American Muslim, I love the direction you are taking America in, regarding its political milestone of racial equality – even if that is backward. Even though you weren’t my first choice for the presidency, nor my second, nor my third, but my seventeenth, I am more than ecstatic that I, along with most of my fellow Muslim community, have been forced to jump on the Trump train back to the 19th century. I am sure it is going to be an interesting journey.
Thank you, Mr. President, for issuing this travel ban preventing Muslims and people from countries such as Syria and Iran to enter ours because “they’re ISIS” and “they’re coming under false pretense”. This, I should express, is such a foolproof plan to stop terrorism! As you always say, “let’s make America great again” and this is why we support you in your actions to make it safe again. Despite the fact that the FBI states that 94% of terrorist attacks in the United States since 1980 have been conducted by non-Muslims, we acknowledge your extensive efforts to eradicate any potential danger posed by the other 6%. We are sure that with your devotion and pride in this country, you will come up with a great idea to help us take care of that other 94%.
Thank you, Mr. President, with this ban you have prevented anyone from those six “dangerous” countries on your list to enter for a vacation or for tourism purposes. Reality is, it is a vacation for us! For the first time in history, our streets aren’t being “crime infested” by people who aren’t from our nation, by people who don’t have her in their best interests, by the “real” ones to blame.
Thank you, Mr. President, for upholding our nation’s social equality. By ensuring that minority groups from the “banned” countries, such as Christians are treated with the exact same prejudice as Muslims from those six countries, making it equally as hard for them to enter the United States (though it is worth noting that 70.6% of adults who reside in America today identify as Christian, and they aren’t being loathed by you). Please take note of my following suggestions to amend the title of your “Muslim Ban”: Iran Ban, Somalia Ban, Syria Ban, and so on for each of the six “terrorist” countries. I find that this would be a better means of labelling your executive order, considering you are now identifying everyone who lives in those countries as “terrorists”.
Thank you, Mr. President, for saving other fellow American Muslims and me, from having to deal with our overseas family. With this Muslim Ban, I no longer fear a tsunami of twenty relatives coming to invade my personal space- and drown me in questions as to why I chose to hop on the Trump train. Personally, I am outraged that liberals, the media, and even federal judges perceive this ban as inappropriate or “unconstitutional”, just because it “violates the first amendment”. I, however, see the ban for what it is- a perfect excuse for why I tell my needy and let us not forget “extremely dangerous”, Muslim family that they cannot visit me.
Thank you, Mr. President, as a result of your daring attempt to save our country from violence, you have successfully characterized Islam as the most violent provoking over other faiths. Your complete discrimination, racism, and prejudice towards U.S Muslims and Muslim-majority countries, such as Pakistan, which you disrespectfully described as a terrorist “haven” in a tweet, will not go unnoticed- among other of your ill-advised and ludicrous ones. It would be in your best interest to plead the fifth amendment and stay silent for our country, instead of drowning our flag (and other ones) in lies and oppression. I truly hope one day in the near future, we are able to eradicate the challenges that lie before us, Muslims; however, apparently the most monstrous challenge found thus far, sits behind the Resolute desk; I sincerely hope we are able to conquer it soon.
Thank you, Mr. President, for everything you have done for us. From all of us within the Muslim communities, we truly thank you for making America great again by propelling us one hundred fifty years back to the 19th century, when African-Americans were severely marginalized and ostracized, as you are now doing so to my family. To my people. To my religion. So, for that we thank you.